Lost Opportunity
by Zanbandia
Summary: She's moved on and he's barely realized what's in front of him.  She's looking forward and he's looking down.  Before he knew it he lost out on a once in a life time chance.  He turns to the right, he's alone, and she a mile ahead.


The restaurant is one they come to each day for their lunch breaks. It was by accident they ran into each other before, but now it is a daily occurrence. Something he looks forward to each day; to spend their forty-five minutes talking and enjoying their time together. Today though, he is thrown for a loop five minutes in.

"I had the biggest crush on your when we were teens."

She's staring at him with a warm smile and bright eyes. Her deep auburn hair is pulled into a ponytail, to combat against the heat of the summer day. She's older now and the corners of her eyes have started to develop crow's feet from years of smiling.

"Wh-what?" is the only thing his is able to choke out once he gets his mouth full of chocolate milk shake down.

She laughs and hands him a napkin, while taping at the corner of her mouth with her left index finger. He wipes away the melted milk that managed to escape his mouth.

She stirs her own vanilla and caramel shake.

"When we were in high school together, I had the biggest crush on you. I ended up thinking I was in love with you." She looks out the window and smiles brightly.

There is no hint of sadness, no regret, no bitter resentment towards him.

"I-Inoue…"

"Maaaaaaaa~! It wasn't until after all that junk with those people who brought your powers back, that I realized how much I could hate you Kurosaki-kun!"

She leans back in her chair and pouts, which still looks cute on her despites she's going to be reaching thirty in two years.

Her pout softens and she finally gives him that sad smile, "But, I realized all I ever really wanted was for you to see me as your equal, your friend."

Her words, that smile…break his heart.

"Inoue, we are friends!" he reaches across the table and grasps her tiny shoulder in his hand. He almost lets go, but after years of getting use to her and realizing she doesn't break from being touched, he able to initiate physical contact. She smiles back and pats his hand.

"Well, now we truly are, Kurosaki-kun." His hand tightens and she gives him a reassuring squeeze.

"We weren't back then. Well, maybe what I'm trying to say is we weren't best friends. Like we are now."

"I'm your best friend?" Ichigo is elated and bitter at the same time.

"Yes! You are one of my best-est friends!" He cracks a smirk at her use of 'best-est' and tries to ignore the fact he is only one of many.

"But you have to admit, Kurosaki-kun, we weren't really close back then. At least to me it didn't feel like that. You always kept me out of the loop when it seemed everyone else was in on it. I was pretty bitter for a long time. For awhile I made excuses and told myself you were just being kind by not trying to worry me. When that didn't work anymore I tried to convince myself it wasn't my place. I kept making excuses; until that day."

Ichigo flinches but Orihime simply smiles then flicks him on the forehead. "Don't you dare! If you start blaming yourself I'm going to tickle your tickle spot!"

He scowls, "I dare you to try!"

She raises one finely, plucked brow and he simply deepens his scowls. The challenge is over when she imitates him and causes both of them to laugh.

"Fine," he concedes, "It's been years and everyone is fine now."

"Exactly," she scolds playfully.

They let each other's words sink in and take a break to gather their thoughts. He speaks first.

"I wish you had told me."

Her answer isn't immediate, in fact their waiter comes with their food and leaves, and it isn't until a few bites in that she replies.

"I'm glad I didn't."

He tries to tell himself it doesn't hurt to hear that.

"I think, not telling you was the most mature and the smartest thing I ever did in my life."

His face snaps to look at her and he knows there is a look of hurt that he can't hide.

"Kurosaki-kun…"

She gets up and comes around, scoots into his side of the booth, and then she hugs him. Over the past years he's received lots of hugs from her but none have hurt as much as this one.

"I'm sorry, Kurosaki-kun. That was worded to harshly. It doesn't mean I hate you or that I don't care for you. I'll always care for you deeply. No matter what but we're friends and I've let those feelings go. I'm sorry. "

He hugs her back and he squeezes his eyes shut.

"Why? I mean, why did you give up?" He's buried his face into the crook of her neck and he's ashamed to admit he doesn't want to let go.

"I didn't give up Kurosaki-kun. I accepted what was presented to me, besides letting you go opened so many more doors for me. So, so, so many more!"

She pulls away and he reluctantly lets her, but she remains next to him.

"When did you let go? After that mess with me regaining my powers?" Ichigo wants to know but at the same time he doesn't want to.

"No, but that did push me in that direction. You have to realize, I was hurt and bitter. I thought we had gotten to the point where you could depend on me and let me in. You didn't and those people nearly took us all out. We were lucky, Kurosaki-kun. It was sheer dumb luck that saved us and that you were able to regain you powers."

He reaches for her hand and latches on. He sad to acknowledge she'll only see this as a friendly touch.

"You still didn't have your powers though. I never knew that you had been unable to use your Rikka after I lost my powers." It was something he never forgave himself for. He had left her unprotected and vulnerable for so long. He had gone on with his life and hadn't realized the changes that were occurring around him until it nearly consumed all his loved ones' lives.

"That was my own fault, Kurosaki-kun. I depended on you too much." She stares down at the table and she looks so pained he's quick to defend her.

"No you—"

"Yes," she states firmly, "I did."

She pulls her hand out of his, leans against the table and places her face in her palms. Ichigo watches as her shoulders rise and fall, she takes in deep breathes to calm herself.

"I limited myself, you know. I wanted for you to be my knight in shining armor so bad. I wanted to be able to give my problems to someone else and have them solve all of it for me. I wanted so much from you and I never realized how selfish I was. I was running away from taking responsibility for myself. I have come to terms with that Kurosaki-kun. I know my faults and I accept them. It's taken years of counseling to accept that part of myself. I placed on you a very big responsibility that I had not right giving."

She turns to him and looks him in the eye. "I wanted you to take care of me. For a long time Kurosaki-kun I wanted to be taken care of. "

Orihime turns in her seat and bows her head to him. "For that I'm sorry. I truly am sorry, Kurosaki-kun."

"Don't," he grits out. "You don't ever have to apologize or bow to me, Inoue."

Ichigo reaches for her and gently eases her out of her bow.

"Inoue," He has so much to say but he's never been good with words, but for her he's willing to try.

"I was always jealous of Kuchiki-san."

That threw him for a loop.

"What? Why?"

"For how close you two were." Again that sad look and Ichigo secretly want s to punch Rukia in the face and himself.

"I assumed you had feelings for her and she had feelings for you."

He stiffens and she smiles at him oh so kindly and sad.

"So, when I found out she confessed to you, it's like something inside me broke and I simply let you go."

He scowls, "Just like that?"

"Oh it was easier said than done! That's for sure Kurosaki-kun. I was in denial for a very long time, and then I cried a lot after accepting it, and then…then I hated you."

It's a punch to the gut to think Orihime ever hated him, but he doesn't blame her. He'd be a little worried if she never did.

"You…you did?"

"For awhile, yeah. Then like my feelings, it faded away with time. "

She smiles. "After that it was like the world opened up to me, Kurosaki-kun. It was amazing."

He's silent and he's not sure what to say and she's smiling and for once she doesn't see his pain.

"Maaaa~! I'm so sorry Kurosaki-kun! Our lunch breaks are almost up and I've wasted your time by going on with silly things of the past! Hurry! Hurry! Let's eat and jet!"

They finish up their meals and pay their bills. They head out to the street and turn to go their separate ways. He scowls and she smiles brightly.

He says farewell first.

"Take care going back to work, Inoue. I'll see you tomorrow."

Orihime nods, "I shall take the utter most care on my way back to the bakery, Kurosaki-kun!"

He nods then turns and starts to walk.

"Kuroskai-kun…"

He turns around and he's enveloped in a warm, soft hug; soft but firm.

"I didn't want to worry you but I wanted you to know. I didn't want to hold on and keep living with all these 'what ifs'. I wanted to let you know and…and…and…"

Her eyes are filling up with tears and soaking his shirt.

"Inoue…"

"I want you to know that we'll always be friends."

She looks up at him and her eyes are teary and her smile is so, so bright.

"Y-yeah…We'll always be friends," He smiles and on the inside he's drowning.

"I love you, Kurosaki-kun. You're one of my most precious friends."

She stands there.

He stands there.

Ten years and Ichigo finds he's lost something precious before he knew he had it.

~.~

_"I had you?"_

_"Apparently, so!"_

_"Awww! I had you and didn't even know it!"_

_"It happens. Maybe next time!"_

_They laugh._

_~.~  
_

_Z says: I really wanted to have a relationship with you. I was crushing on you for the longest time._

_M says: Was? What changed?_

_Z says: I realized that I can't change who you like and I've accepted and like you for you. I wanted you to like me but I accepted that you never will like me like that._

_M says: I see._

_Z says: Are we still friends?_

_M says: Of course! _

_~.~_

An: Sorry if anyone was confused about the ending. Those are actual conversations that took places between me and two of my crushes. The first one is funny because a classmate said she couldn't accept him and me being together but we were just friends and cook with that. I looked at my friend/crush and said, "I had you" and you see how he responded. Its a happy memory because I can look back and laugh on it. The last conversation is when I confessed to a long time friend. She was very understanding and kind about it. I was always scared we wouldn't be friends afterwards but she said that would we be, and guess what we are! I put those in there to show that I believe Orihime's feelings aren't a bad thing and that its very natural for people to fall in love and sometimes I think the fandom is either too hard on her for it or expects her to always love Ichigo. I wanted to make Orihime's love for him a little more realistic. _  
_


End file.
